Baby Shower Etiquette (2024)

What happens at a baby shower?

Baby showers are all different depending on the time of year, if it’s a first baby, who’s hosting it, where it’s hosted and your culture. Some people prefer a baby shower in the morning, other’s an afternoon tea and some a low-key barbecue dinner. Depending on who’s hosting the shower, it may be held at the mother-to-be’s home, a friend or relative’s house or even a restaurant. If it’s during summer, it may be hosted outdoors at a park or the beach, especially if there’s younger children involved.

No matter what time of day, there's always food involved and usually some sort of baby shower games. Whilst some attendees may roll their eyes at Baby Shower games, such as “guess the baby food” or “what’s the baby poo?”, they can be a good way to break the ice and add some fun. Depending on who’s attending the shower some hosts may set up activities where guests are encouraged to decorate a piece of art to hang in the baby's room or match the baby photo to the adult at the shower. These are much less cliche than some of those traditional baby-shower games!

Like a wedding, some hosts will also offer favours when guests leave to thank them for coming. Whilst this isn’t usually the case in New Zealand, it is common in other parts of the world.

Baby Shower Etiquette (2024)

FAQs

What is proper etiquette for who throws a baby shower? ›

Who plans and hosts a baby shower? According to tradition, baby showers are typically hosted by a friend or distant relative (like a cousin or an aunt) instead of an immediate family member. This custom is believed to have developed to avoid the appearance that the family was simply on a mission to collect gifts.

What if no one offers to throw you a baby shower? ›

If you're worried that no one will offer to throw a baby shower for you, talk to a close friend or a relative and, if you're comfortable doing so, ask her to take the reins. But again, there are no hard-and-fast rules — if no one is available or you simply prefer to host the event yourself, feel free to do so.

Is it poor etiquette to host your own baby shower? ›

It's totally fine for parents-to-be to host their own baby shower. We completely understand that some expecting parents might want a certain level of control over the celebration of their little one and enjoy party planning.

Who is supposed to give the mother to be a baby shower? ›

Traditionally, close friends, cousins, aunts, sisters-in-law, or co-workers of the mother-to-be hosted baby showers.

Who traditionally pays for a baby shower? ›

Who Traditionally Pays for a Baby Shower? The hostess traditionally pays for the baby shower and its associated costs. However, the hostess can divide up the responsibility and costs by asking a few close family members or friends to co-host.

Who should not throw a baby shower? ›

Traditionally, baby showers were hosted by close female friends or not-so-immediate female relatives (like aunts or cousins) of the mom-to-be. But times have changed, and now it's considered acceptable for just about anyone to host this celebration.

Do people still do favors at baby showers? ›

If you're wondering whether or not you should provide party favors to your guests, honestly, it's really up to you. Party favors are a nice gesture to thank guests for coming, but they can quickly get expensive. If you do choose to give party favors, feel free to cap your spending at just a few dollars per guest.

Is it rude to go to a baby shower without a gift? ›

It is customary to give a gift when arriving at the baby shower. However, the host would prefer you attend without a gift than for you not to come at all.

Should a mother throw her daughter a baby shower? ›

HELEN'S ANSWER: It is awkward for a mother to host a baby shower for her daughter because gifts are involved. If you are an immediate family member having the party, it is like you are watching to see who gives what gift. It is much better for a close friend to have the party.

Is it rude not to open gifts at a baby shower? ›

The next etiquette tip for modern baby showers is that the mom can but doesn't have to open gifts at the event. In the past, when showers were smaller and women-only events, it was often easier for the mom-to-be to open presents at the event.

Who not to invite to your baby shower? ›

The modern baby shower has no strict rules: You can invite whoever the family wants to be included. Just be sure to clearly state whether or not you're accommodating +1's.

How many people should I invite to a baby shower? ›

How Many People Should Attend a Baby Shower. Every baby shower is different, but most ladies agree that 15 to 30 is the perfect number of ladies at a typical baby shower or about 30-40 for a coed. These numbers change depending on the size of the family, number of friends, and even work colleagues involved.

Does mother-in-law host a baby shower? ›

Who Hosts a Baby Shower? Most baby showers should be hosted by a sister, mother, mother-in-law, or close friend. Baby showers were traditionally thrown by family members who weren't close with the parents-to-be, to avoid the assumption that close family members wanted to collect gifts for themselves.

What do you wear for a baby shower? ›

And secondly, fear not because dressing for a day of bub-to-be celebrations is pretty straightforward. Yup, you read that correctly. There are no set rules for baby shower outfits, so unless the invite says otherwise, you're basically free to wear whatever you fancy and feel the most comfortable in.

Is it better to have a baby shower on Saturday or Sunday? ›

Best Time of Week for a Baby Shower

Weekends are often ideal because less people have work scheduled and are able to attend. Saturdays and Sundays are also the time-honored choice, so more traditional mothers will likely prefer this option.

Who is expected to throw a baby shower? ›

Tradition states that when it comes to throwing a baby shower, those who love you should do the honors. This person could be your best friend from college, a colleague from work, the next-door neighbor… or your sister, sister-in-law, mother, aunt, etc.

Should a family member host a baby shower? ›

“Since the occasion for a baby shower is to bestow upon the mother-to-be presents that a newborn baby would need, it is considered inappropriate for immediate family members to host the baby shower,” echoed Tami Claytor, the etiquette coach behind Always Appropriate Image & Etiquette Consulting.

Who do you honor for a baby shower? ›

Traditionally, the mother-to-be is the guest of honor at the baby shower. That said, if you're hosting a couples' shower, then you should list both parents as the guests of honor. A few ways you can designate the guest of honor in your invitation wording are…

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